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Going Boldly Where You've Never Gone Before
When I think of "fear," I don't usually think of jumping out of airplanes, giving a speech, or starting a new business. I think, "dance class." Not that those first three don't bring up a lot of fear in me, but because I got one of my very best lessons in overcoming fear simply by going to a dance class. All of my life I wanted to be someone who danced. I used to watch with envy as friends would dance at parties or dance clubs. I'd stare longingly for hours at couples swing dancing at street festivals or doing the foxtrot at weddings. In my room alone, I'd play music and move around a bit, but I always felt like a clutz — like I was all toes. Then one day in April I read a promotion about "National Dance Week" in San Francisco. Dozens of venues were offering dance performances — and dance lessons — for free. By some grace that dropped in, I heard a compassionate voice in my head say, "How about if you went to a free dance class and didn't expect anything at all of yourself except to show up?" The voice even added, "If all you do is stand there and cry with fear, that's fine. If you run out half-way throught, that is fine. You can just watch what happens, accept it all, and see it as a Zen workshop, not as a dance class. So I did. I went to a beginner's class called Essential Fusion Rhythms at a local dance studio. I had read that the class would include choreographed movements to a variety of music, using steps from jazz, hip hop, ballet, etc. It seemed like a good place to start. I felt extraordinarily awkward just trying to find my way around the building and changing clothes for the class. I felt awkward and gawky throughout the whole class. But you know what? I didn't cry. I didn't leave. I stayed through (and survived) the whole class. And ... drum roll please — even though part of me felt awkward and gawky, another part was exuberant and so very very happy. She was dancing. All her life she wanted to be someone who danced. And here she was— dancing. Those decades-old voices of fear had finally been challenged. And the result was that I felt more alive and vital than I had for years. I learned firsthand what Dr. Robert Anthony meant when he said, "Courage is simply the willingness to be afraid and act anyway." *** Most of us go through life experiencing some level of fear. There may be small things, like learning to dance, that haunt us all our lives. There may be large things, like divorce or career change or moving. Where do we find the courage to walk down these new paths in life? How do we cope with the loud voices that keep us paralyzed? What do we do to find the courage to begin something that scares us? Next week, Simply Celebrate's Tricia Huebner is going to be interviewing a woman who not only knows a lot about courage — she lives it. Mary Ann Bailey is life coach and author of the fothcoming book, Gentle Warrior; Awakening the Courage to Live a Bold and Brilliant Life. Information on signing up for the 50-minute teleseminar is below. After the interview, Mary Ann will answer questions from participants so it is a great chance to explore the topic with someone who really understands. Here's an excerpt from Mary Ann Bailey's fothcoming book, Gentle Warrior; Awakening the Courage to Live a Bold and Brilliant Life.
One of the easiest ways to keep our life stuck is to live it from the middle rather than closer to the edge. Living life from the middle means to remain safely in our comfort zone. It means doing things the same way, avoiding change at all costs, and eliminating spontaneity from life. As boring as this may sound, it is the way many people live. And, as a result, the middle is an extremely crowded place, devoid of much creativity, possibility and inspiration. It is the perfect place to experience feeling stuck. — Mary Ann Bailey
Scroll down to find out more about the September 17th conversation with Mary Ann!
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Ann Bailey -- Life Coach and Author.